please board........

ok i have made a post to my profile it is dated 4/05/06.....go and read if you get time.........and let me no if you have had this prob and let me no.......thanks vickie r.

hey Vicki..I am almost 3 yrs. out and i can honestly say since I lost the weight no one has made a "stupid" comment, but during the losing phase I did hear it. I just smile and walk away..read your post over..everything you said about "yourself" was very "positive" so tell me..do you really give a flying %$$'s A$$..what they say?? you made an incredibly hard decison and now you will make that difficult lifestyle change..ooo to be so perfect as all those other folks who think we took the easy way out...well all I can say is SCREW EM...(can I say that here?) LOL always remember this, as I said it to myself over and over.." I did this for me"..not for my family, not for my friends..for ME..and I am very happy with me right now!! Brenda

Hi Vickie, I, too, am very hesitant to tell people how I have lost 97 pounds in 11 months. I have never had anyone make comments to my face but they certainly give me that "you are so lazy" look. These closed-minded folks have no idea how much hard work loosing weight is, no matter what method is used. In fact, the ones with the most hurtful comments have never had to deal with fat issues. I loved your comments about your daughter not wanting you to have the surgery because she liked you the way you were. I have 4 daughters and they all said the same thing...they have complained about my "boniness" now when they snuggle in next to me on the couch. They are willing to admit, though, that I am much happier and they love the active me. We are playing tennis twice a week and the thing I am most proud of is that we have walked the triple crown races in Louisville and will walk the mini-marathon this year. I still have trouble believing that I actually have the stamina and the muscle to race-walk 6-8 miles 3 times a week! Vickie, you made the best decision you could for you! There are hundreds of us out here who understand and support you and have dealt with hurtful comments from ignorant people. These are the same people who pass judgement based on the color of your skin, your address, or the job you do. Stay strong in the pride of your accomplishment so far and the next time someone asks you how you manage to look so fine tell them hard work and portion control, just like everyone else.

I've had the same conversations with people b4 I had surgery. When I told people I was doing this they'd do the eye roll & say "I'll diet b4 I sink to having surgery." My reply was "Good to know that & you're starting your diet when??..........." I totaly agree with you. I did this surgery for me to extend my life & to enrich my quality of life. I'm only 3 weeks out & I've lost 27 lbs already but I'm doing my protein & walking & vitamins. It's in no way easy & if any fool thinks this is an easy way out is an idiot!!! Lie Brenda said..........SCREW THEM!!!!!!!!!

Ive had people tell me that I took the easy way out too. F*&% em. Thats what I say. The last person that told me that got a ear full. This person had recently had heart surgery. My response to them was..."well, you had to have heart surgery, I guess if you had took better care of yoursefl, and made better food choices you would not be where you were a few weeks ago, laid up in the hospital JUST LIKE I WAS." It shut him up. AND pissed him off, but yanno..thats ok. I am finally learning its OK to **** people off, and not have to take crap off of them anymore. BUt honestly, dont worry about the people who say that crap, Life is too short to live with that kind of jealousy and negativity.

Way to go...I love your attitude.

Hi Vickie ~ I usually post on the main messageboard or on the TN messageboard, but since I live so close to Kentucky, I thought I'd check this board out tonight and ran into your post. (I'm preo-op and have been dieting to get a head start on the weight loss until I hear something from the insurance company.) I haven't had your experience, but your vent on your profile reminded me of something the psychiatrist said when I went for my psych. eval. She warned me that there would be some people out there who will try to sabotage my weightloss. She said this is usually done out of jealousy or insecurity. She also went on to say that there will be some who will criticize and condemn for the WLS choice. Many cannot relate what it's like to have a weight problem (my husband is one of them ~ he eats twice as much as I do and stays slim.) So, it is ignorance and tactlessness that causes them to say such hurtful things. I agree with the comments others have made. They can't know what it's like until they've walked a mile in our shoes, so they have no right to judge! BTW, you look great ~ keep up the good work! Melodie

Screw 'em! Being a male, nobody has dared to say that to me. Think of all the folks who know you made the right decision. Then... think of how much better you are vs. the 50 pounds or so you might have lost to regain the other way. Hoping to meet you at one of Dr. Bolar's monthly meetings. Dave

Ya know..I can see this group definately needs to meet at the conference..we have so mu*****ommon and it's awesome meeting people from the boards.. I honestly don't get hit with alot anymore..I think when people see we are happy with our decision and they see how much healthier and happier we are..they don't even bother..wouldn't do them any good to say anything to me..because I actually could care less how they feel or what they think..I had family members (my own daughter) who was totally against this surgery. today she is my biggest supporter and a huge supporter of this surgery...she will tell it like it is.."this isn't the easy way out"...Hopefully she will be at the conference in Lexington as she loves to come help me. I would give anything if she felt comfortable doing public speaking and could talk about this from a support standpoint... I do have to tell you something funny though, when she first started dating her boyfriend, she was attending support group meetings with me. one night he called as we were driving to the meeting and asked where she was going..she said, mom has a meeting..he asked "what kind?"..she said "anger management" I about died!...LOL..he got real quiet then said..Oh!! that's it..man did he behave around me for awhile, once she got to know him she told him about the surgery, proudly showed him by weight loss picture album..even he is supportive now! so hang in there..prove you made the right decision ...then who cares what others think, you are going to be so happy with the results!!