Scared Newbie

Hi everyone, let me introduce myself. My name is Holli and I am 37 years old. I am married and have 3 kids ages, 15, 14 and 12. I am the Office Manager for 4 of the radio stations here in town. I have only lived in E'town KY for a year now and don't have much of a support base if any. I haven't been obese all my life...only started gaining in my early 20's. I once weighed only 125. I'm really struggling with the fear of dying. Not the fear of the life change at all...or the surgery or pain. Just dying. Could anyone shed a little light in my direction? I have chosen Dr. Shina. I've been to a seminar and I would just love to hear from some people that are in, or have had the surgery. Thanks, Holli [email protected]

HI Holli, I am 19 mos post op. I understand where you are coming from. One of the hardest things for me and my wife was the reality that you can die from the surgery. I made a will and made my peace with my obese life. It was difficult and I took my time making this decision. I am also a WLS Coach and specialize in helping people to make the decision to have surgery or not. Check out my website - www.decision-of-a-lifetime.com There is an article I wrote for ObesityHelp Magazine called Decision of a Lifetime where I talk about letting go of my fears. It was very cathartic and helped me to feel comfortable with my decision. Hope this helps, Steve

Hi Sweetie, I am 13 days post op, and was scared to death that I would die. I turned 50 years old the day after my surgery. I was an avid smoker of 25 years, smoking 2-3 pks per day. I am diabetic, neuropathy,highblood pressure, sleep apnea, gerd, cancer survivor, +++several other aliments. I stopped smoking, started walking 3 miles per day, went on a liver shrinking diet, and basically did what my surgeon required me to do before surgery. I came through my 7 hour WLS without a hitch. I feel better than I have in years, and am now down -24-1/2lbs. I don't know Dr. Shina, but I did have my surgery in Ky. even though I live in Missouri. Dr. Alex Argotte is my surgeon, and He is wonderful. He promised me he wouldn't let me die and ruin his perfect record, and He was true to his word. If you feel you have selected the right surgeon, then put it in his and the good lord's hands, and you will be just fine. I don't even take any diabetes medications anymore, and before surgery I took oral medications and 5 shots per day. I pray you can find peace in your decision to have WLS. It's a hard decision to come to, but I promise you. If you have the results I did, it is so worth it. Good luck and God bless you......Jenni

Thank you for your kind words. I really appreciate all the help in this I can. I know that in the end...it is all my decision. No one can make that for me (even tho that would be nice). I really feel that in a way I am being totally selfish. Yes, I am doing this for myself but I'm also doing this for my husband and kids. My husband married a thin woman...well, thinner, and I don't want to be an embarassment to my kids. However, what kind of mom am I if I do this for me and I end up leaving my kids without a mom? But when I think of the possibilites of how my life could be after...WOW! I get so excited thinking about it! It's not an easy decision...the hardest I've ever had to make. Thank you for your support. Holli

Hi Holli, I am in the exact position you are in, I have 2 kids and relatively in good health . I was also thin in my early 20's but now i need to lose100 lbs. I have had most of all the testing done and I have no fear of anything about the surgery but dying. This is the hardest decision to make. i have seen alot of people on this message board who had Dr. Shina as their doctor. I would recommend just getting on this site and doing alot of research. It seems to help me some. I think that if you don't have alot of health problems your chances are really good of being OK. That is my opinion only though. This comes from the research I have done about it though. Good Luck and hope u can come to a peaceful decision. I think I have. D. Wallace

Thank you so much for your email. I think I've spent more time at work researching this than doing my actual job! I'm surprised we still have our radio stations on the air! I really a fairly healthy for having a BMI of 46.5 ( I think...I can't remember now) The only thing that is a concern is I have borderline to high blood pressure. I've been on meds now for about 3 years. Other than that, my sugar and everything else is fine. Thanks again for the encouraging words! It always helps to know you aren't the only one out there and from what I"ve seen about this message board we ALL have alot of support... God Bless, Holli [email protected]

Holli, I think anyone facing this surgery goes through the emotions that you are. It is a scary thought to willingly choose to have surgery. However, the mortality rate is very low, odds are with you that things will be ok. I am 50 years old and had no desire to meet an untimely death. However, I was MORE afraid of dying from weight related issues than the surgery. Although I was relatively healthy with a BMI of about 42, I knew that I was a ticking time bomb with high blood pressure. I came to peace with the idea of surgery and my husband supported that decision because he wants me around a long time. I'm now 5 weeks out and SO happy that I got it done! No regrets here... I'm looking forward to a long, happy, healthy and THIN life! Rhonna

You know that I think is one of my problems. I can hear my husband and my family tell me that I am a walking time bomb and they question why I am so afraid of dying during surgery and why I'm not afraid to die if I don't have the surgery. I don't have many health issues so it's almost like I'm denying the fact that I could drop at any moment. The mind is a weird thing. I have not yet heard one person wish they hadn't gone through with it so that in itself is a comfort! I thank you for your support and I wish you all the best! Take care on your journey of a lifetime! God Bless, Holli [email protected]