Whose goal is the right goal? (Sorry, long-winded)

Okay here goes...

I have struggled with the whole "goal" thing.  I posted about it on my profile a while back.  But today I'm still struggling.   Here are my stats:  Height 5'8 1/2"  Current weight: 167  BMI: 25 According to the insurance chart (M-Plan) I should weigh 142.  I think that's a bit low as I have a rather large frame and have always been pretty muscular.  According to my NUT I was at goal the last time she saw me and I weighed 175.  The Surgeon hasn't really said much except that the 142 is too low (My husband accompanied me on my last visit with Dr. I and says I am approximately her same size).   I am happy with my size (8) and because I'm tall I know that anything smaller will be almost impossible to find in talls.  I'm already having a difficult time finding sleeves long enough.  Stores that carry tall slacks don't have them in less than a 6.   I'm planning on having a breast lift and tummy tuck as soon as the PS can fit me in and I'm told that will take an additional 8-12 pounds off and will probably put me in a solid size 6. To make a long story short (TOO LATE), the problem is:  Some days I still look at myself and all I see is fat.   When I ask my husband, he tap dances but implies that I still need to lose more weight.  I don't know what to believe.  I can't seem to settle on a goal.  How do I know if I have arrived at my goal if I don't have one?  I'm afraid that if I can't settle this issue I will become complacent and gain the weight back.  But I also don't want to be forever in pursuit of a "perfect" weight. Any suggestions?

I think it is an individual decision. My surgeon said his resonable goal for me is 180. I'd love to be 140  but I know that is probably not possible.  I've set my personal goal as 160.  That doesn't mean that I won't try to do better but if I can get to 160 and can't get lower I won't beat my self up over it.  Heck I may never make it to 180 as slow as I'm going right now but I'll keep working at it.  I think it is wrong for insurance companies to pin numbers on us.  None of us are built the same.  I'm short (5'4") muscular and large boned.  I've never been skinny and I never will be.  I just want to be healthy.  So if I wiegh 180 and can work out for an hour each day and feel good.  My cholesterol, glucose and blood pressure are normal,  I'm happy.  You have to decided what makes you happy.

Annette, I think 'technically' a 'successful' surgery is one in which the patient loses ~75% of their excess overweight pounds.  As to 'goal'..no one, not the dietician or surgeon, has ever given me a target to shoot for. So...I am shooting for a normal BMI...which is 20-25.  A normal BMI for me at 5'6" is 115-154 lbs. Since the calculator only did it in whole inches, yours would be: @ 5'8": 132-164, @5'9": 136-169. I would guess your range to be at 134-166. Naurally, one who is big-boned would look sickly at 134 at your height...that is why there is a fair range..to accomidaite different bone structures. Remember also that if you haven't had plastics, the excess skin can account for 10-20 lbs so your 167 is going to drop to ~147-157. So girlfriend, I would say you are exactly where you want to be!! Sherri

Sweetie, Do not let the scales run your life! I use my "weight" as a guideline but go by my frame and how I feel physically. Dr. Huse told me that he is so glad that I am not going by the chart for my goal weight. At 6 feet tall and very large framed Doc says that 250 is a reasonable goal for me. According to the charts I am way off base but I know structure wise I am in good shape. After my plastic surgery I well actually be below my goal and that is fine. I am more into feeling good about me and knowing that I will moniter my weight as a guideline to keeping the pounds off the rest of my life. Honey as I always say...You need to bloom where you are planted! Determine where you feel you should be and don't let someone else's idea of where you should be matter. My surgery was for me and that is all I have to be concerned with. It is ok to be selfish and please just yourself and be at peace about this. Look in the mirror and see the awesome woman you are! Hugs! Marianne