Rude?

So like you all know, I'm pretty new to this mom thing. And maybe Gwyn having to go into the hospital so soon after birth has made me a bit paranoid. But I dont think its a rude request to ask for clean hands before handling my baby is it? My dad's girlfriend (well, she was when he died, she's living with a NEW boyfriend already) was all offended when I asked her to wash her hands before picking Gwyn up. I'm sorry but thats MY baby, and IM the one that has to take care of her when she's sick and watch her suffer. I'd rather skip as much of that as possible. So just be forewarned, I'm not sure if its rude or not, but I'll have a bottle of hand sanitzer with me at the exchange. Please dont think im saying youre dirty or anything by offering some before you handle the baby. I just dont want to have to see her sick again. My apologies if this is rude, but sick babies are no fun!

Darrah, I don't think it's rude at all. Its your choice on how you do things and everyone should be more than happy to oblige you. I think its great that you want to make sure you can try to control as many germs as possible its your right as a mom. Heck when my kids were that age and got older I had plenty of smokers in my family and extended family I asked them not to smoke around my kids. Also to make sure after they smoked not to hold her or him right away. The smoke needs to kinda disapate a bit. Keep up the GREAT WORK!!!! you are just fine in my book. Bonnie

Nothing rude at all about this, if you run out of hand santizer, I carry some in my purse. See you on Saturday.

Darrah...As a nurse I know of all the little germs that are around and asking people to wash before handling your baby girl is not rude to ask. You are the mama and you are looking out for your most beloved possesion.....Deb

Darrah, Of course you AREN'T being rude- you are being WISE!! With all of the germs/illness out there, it is only right that you do ask. After all, Gwyn is your percious child, and no one (in their right mind )should/would be offended by you asking them to use sanitizer! I keep a bottle in my purse too, "just cause", I don't want to pick up anything~ ((hugs)) Ellen PS. Did you get my pm?

When I first had my daughter, everyone on both sides of the family thought I was rude too. I would offer them the sanitizer when they reached for her. She was born in September, germ season. She actually still ended up getting RSV 2 times that first winter. I would like to say that helped, but many family members respond with the same comments 3 years later on the birth of my son. One thing I seem to notice is that my mom and mother in law both feel put off that Dr's have changed thier minds about certain things. Here are things I have learned they believe and get frustrated with me about for having a different opinion: 1. Let the baby cry it out, they need to work thier lungs. Me: Research now shows in the first 6 months, your baby needs to be comforted when crying. 2. Baby food should be introduced in month one. Me: Nutrition comes from my milk why would I even want to hassle with cerel now for no added benefit. 3. Babies need to be exposed to germs. Me: Of course they do, I am not talking about locking my kid in a closet, just hand washing, thats all. 4. Babies have to sleep on thier belly or if they throw up they will drown. Me: Studies have shown a significant decrease in SIDS by sleeping on your back, plus I have seen my kids throw up on thier back and trust me they can project it way out of the drowning range. It has been a huge frustration for me. I think they believe I am judging how they raised thier children. I AM NOT. I think they are both great mothers who raised thier children with love and care and used current knowledge to make wise decisions. I wish they would feel the same for me. My advise is to just let it roll off and remember that no matter how many looks you get or comments, you are responsible for that child as it's mother, no one else can say that. When I remind myself of this it empowers me to just say, I really appreciate you honoring my choices.

Everyone above said it all. MY daughter still does that and my granddaughter is a year old. you were not rude, you are a good mom. hugs to you and Gwyn. Love, Gail

I agree with everyone too - not rude! I also agree about relatives being put off by the things dr's say differently now too. I didn't feed either of my children anything but breast milk for their first six months, and it's a wonder my mom and MIL didn't call child protection on me for starving my kids! Never mind their little legs were so chubby they could barely bend them!! LOL Ignore what people say, they will say and do the most unbelievable things sometimes... My first DD was a little colicky and would've been nursing 24/7 if I allowed her to, and she refused any pacifiers or anything like that, so to get her to stop crying in public I would often put my pinkie in her mouth and she would suck on that. Well, my parents were guardians of a teenage boy at that time, and he was wonderful with the kids, but he used to put HIS pinkie in her mouth and it drove me batty!! I mean, there is a heck of a lot of difference between a mom's pinkie, that I KNEW was clean vs. a 15 year old boy's pinkie!! OMG! You just do whatever you know is right and to heck with people who get all offended by it. They ought to know better anyway. I never hold new babies or let my snotty nosed three year old near one unless we wash up first. Just seems a common courtesy to me. Kim

Darrah, Absolutely not. You are just trying to protect your baby from as many germs as possible. I can remember when I had my kids (about 30 years ago) In the hospital they kept a can pf sanitizer by the bed and even before I got to pick up the baby the nurse would spray this foam stuff in my hands. it was some kind of sanitizer. I jus think that it is a good habit to get in to.. By the way, Gwyn is so gorgeous. Dawn R.

Darrah- You are totally right to insist on it! There are even cute little signs that you put on the stroller or carrier to remind people not to touch the baby with dirty hands. The link is below. I know quite a few moms with premies from my multiples club, so I always get them these signs as a gift... http://www.mytinyhands.com/ And you are right.... she is YOUR baby, and everyone else needs to deal with YOUR rules!!! Belle