WHAT DID YOU TELL PEOPLE???

Thanks for the advice( I need all I can get) I need to be carefull with what I say because I'm not really comfortable with lying, BUT....( you could see that comming huh? lol!) I will skirt around the subject a bit, not telling them too much, but not really lying either, if you know what I mean. lol! I will say that I was a life saving surgery (it was) I think I'll mention abdomin, stomach (maybe), intestines, and the dreaded BOWELS! lol! (which Doc did do something with all of them.) and I will add that I'm on all kinds of medication.(7 total: calcium, iron, b-12, thiamine, multi vitamin, biotine,and glucosimine(that ones for my joints, but I'm still taking it!) I decided not to take the full 8 weeks my Dr. is going to give me (I think)LMAO!!!! I agree that it could really make things a whole lot worse, but....I am also NOT going to kill my self to get back there too soon to have all this work thrown at me and to be treated like a piece of crap either!!! I need to be "physically" strong so that I may handle what they decide that thier going to throw at me "mentally". OMG! I JUST GOT A PHONE CALL FROM THE ONLY PERSON I AM CLOSE TO AT MY SCHOOL AND SHE SAID THAT THE PRICIPLE IS ON A RAMPAGE AND JUST SURPLUSED A GUIDANCE COUNCLER TODAY TO HIRE ANOTHER ONE OF HER FRIENDS, AND HAD A MEETING THIS MORNING ABOUT WHOM SHE WAS GETTING RID OF NEXT!(SHE HAD A WHOLE LIST OF TEACHERS) SHE SAID IN THAT MEETING THAT SHE WAS GETING RID OF ANYONE THAT HAS NO LOYALTY TO HER! ...........uh-oh ! I do need to contact the Union tom. and ask them some questions. I don't think they can help UNTIL... something happens though. (sigh) I gotta go I'm kind freakin out! I love you all, LIL'RED KEEP ALL THE POSTS/ADVICE COMMING!

First of all, my psychotic principal sounds like she grew up in the same sick world as your principal!! But, I'm really confused. What could she do to you, besides make you miserable at the school but changing your position or giving you extra work to do? How can she replace you? Are you a new employee? I'm a teacher in Broward County and I can assure you that my principal couldn't do anything about getting me out of the school, unless I was arrested or something. Even then, it's not even her decision, but the school board's. I know the world you're in with her. I've been teaching for 12 years, but have never worked for someone with no morals, until now. Most of the staff left last year, due to her unprofessional, immoral behavior. I stayed, obviously. I guess I'm a glutton for punishment. So, back to your problem. What is she saying you did wrong that would warrent her replacing you? I don't get it. In Broward, a principal can't remove anyone, ever! I could call her any name in the book and she couldn't do a thing as far as my job. I'm really curious, so please let me know. Laura

I was so taken aback by your situation, I forgot to say what I did when I had the surgery. I had mine done at the beginning of July, so it was a month before I returned to work. I'd made the decision that I wouldn't tell anyone other than the friends I hung out with over the summer. These are the people who would see the change in my eating habits. From work, there were about 6 people who knew. Other than that, I didn't want anyone to know. I didn't want to be watched, nor did I want anyone to question my decision or think I'd given up and taken the easy way out. When I returned, I'd lost about 40 pounds, I think. I started at 311 and no one who didn't know even noticed. The way I carried the weight, I was really down about 60-70 pounds before it was really noticable. I'd gone to Germany for 10 days and walked miles everyday. Upon my return, I think I had bought some new, tight clothes. Then I got comments several times a day. But, when I was asked, I just said I was eating less and exercising more. If I had been asked directly if I'd had the surgery, I wouldn't have lied about it, but I didn't volunteer any info. All of my friends kept my secret. Now, 15 months later, everyone knows. Once I knew this thing was really working, I told people gradually. Most of them said they wouldn't known, if I hadn't said. While it's happening to us, it seems like we're on display and that it's really obvious how fast we're losing. But, in fact, most people are paying attention to their own lives and don't notice as much as we think they do. Anyway, hope that helps. Laura

I said that I had to have major surgery. I told the HR director which surgery (had to - the FMLA paperwork I had to have my doc fill out left nothing to the imagination). As time grew closer, I told staff. I thought that I'd get the awkward questions and most gossip out of the way now, rather than face it when I got back to work. Eight weeks? I was out four, and I thought that I could have gone back in two (no complications). Maybe to smooth things, ask if there are things, when you are feeling up to it, that you can do from home? I was able to do tons from home - even annual staff appraisals - with a phone, fax, email and a CD-ROM of my oft-used docs on my computer. Are you in a union? Kristen

LIl Red - one thing you will learn in this process is that you're always gonna wonder of what others gonna think of you w/o or with surgery, or whatever. Do you really care what they think?? Okay, I did have to tell my immediate peers because I had develop a relationship with them. You're more at work than anywhere else. However,do you care for these people and what they think? I did tell those that were immediate to me cause it's HARD not to but then again I was so happy about doing it I was always/am always talking about it..though not to many others...however as time as gone out and the questions came (about my weight loss) I have told some and I have said that I just work out and started eating more healthy..others I have told well I did have gastric bypass but I work out hard and I eat right so even I had surgery I still believe that doing the right things have helped me have success. I know some who even tell waiters/waitress - now those kinds of people don't need to know - though I did go to a buffet style restaurant and I wanted the kids meal - so I used my doc's meal card to be allowed to get the kids meal. It's a sticky situation however it's your own personal choice to reveal what or how much of your personal life you want to share and you shouldn't feel obligated to do more. Believe once you start getting more confidence in your life - you'll really start telling people off (within reason). I don't think it's anybody's business to know your business..but if you feel for your sanity's sake that you need to say something tell them and get it over with - or not and tell them to leave you the hell alone! Some people are naturally nosy - and you have to be strong enough to put them in their place. Good luck to you. As for me - I had OPEN RNY and I was back to work (secretary) in 2 weeks! But if you have the time - you take as much as you need.