Beck Discussion - Day 4

Hi All... continuing on with our discussion, sorry for the time lapse. Hope you were able to catch up some. Day 4 - Give Yourself Credit! Dr. Beck says people who struggle with their weight tend to be hard on themselves. They are very self-critical. How many of you can relate to that! *hand raised high in the air here!* We tend to beat ourselves up for everything we do wrong. We need to learn how to give ourselves credit for everything we do right. Boy do I need to learn this! If u can sit down everytime you eat or you surpass the bread when its offered to you.. u are supposed to pat your own back and say to yourself "good job". I know not many of us do this enough! This is supposed to help our self confidence and build awareness that we are strong and in control. If you make a mistake you can then view it as a momemtary lapse in judgement or a small mistake and move on easier. hmmmmm can i Mel thinks to herself. She gives 2 scenerios for us to look at. Its about "bread".. take time to see the difference between scenerio 1 and 2. How do you react in those situations? Me being an all or nothing person tends to react like 1 which I know I need to work on my issues with.. its like once I mess up all is lost even though I *know* in my head this just isn't true. We need to give ourselves credit for what we have accomplished thus far with our Beck Solution book.. We are reading our ARC (you should be if you aren't, at least twice a day remember!) Reading any other response cards we have made along the lines. Chose two diets - primary and backup Sitting down every time we eat. Recognizing sabotaging thoughts and attempting to turn them around when they occur Doing the "to-do" list and checking those items off each day we go through. Reading this book... just reading it itself. There are many "victories" in a day that we should be applauding ourselves for and the ability to refrain. She gives the example of not eating the samples at the grocery store. Ignoring the treats brought in at work if they aren't on your dietary plan, etc... (I do congratulate myself for these things!) She says as we practice this skill it will come more and more automatic to us. If you need help remembering to do this, write the word "credit" on a sticky note and place it somewhere. Try pulling out your diet notebook and think back through the past few hours at some of the things worthy of receiving credit for. Write them down. When you check off your to-do list, give yourself credit for a job well done. She also talks about buying a small counter to click every time u do this. My first though.. sabotage.. "how dumb!" lol... see, I am so bad! That brings us to... you guessed it.. sabotaging thoughts and how to counteract them with credit thoughts/helpful responses instead! Read over them.. (I have the giggles still about the counter.. sorry Dr. Beck!) Make sure you do your "to-do" list. I will do Day 5 on Monday, since I am off track. Sorry about that and have a good weekend! I may go out of town to a support grp monday so it might be late monday/early tuesday.. hugs.

Hi, Mel... I didn't read Day 4 yet... but will and respond later. Reading your info puts a good deal of the content here... Thanx! I am celebrating the victories. I am also having a hard time "training" myself to "sit". Is this easy for you? Dawn also has a "sit" problem, I believe. What's the deal? Why is this so hard for some and not for others? At least now I am catching myself doing it so that's some improvement. I mentioned the other day that I am wearing a pedometer. I still haven't gone for an actual walk wearing it; just general walking around. It seems like it is in the same area as Beck's clicker... because I am aware of it... and paying a bit more attention... it's made a change. Have a good weekend!!! Ro

Here's my notes on day four: credit worthy behaviours: Throwing out open bags of chocolate chips Clearing visible foods from the counters Not replenishing the Craisins when they ran out I tried the sticky note thing and find I don't like it but have to do something else that will work as well. Maybe I just need to put the notes inside cabinets or my purse instead of outside the cabinets. I know it is important to have these reinforcing thought patterns established.

for your tossing, clearing, and not purchasing of trigger foods! I put my ARCs inside my eyeglass case so I read them a few times per day. Actually, might need to add a few new key words to the current list. Visible reminders can also be non-verbal I would think... maybe a small "reward" jar in the cabinet, pantry, fridge, and "that NSA-ice cream lovin' freezer" would do the trick for you. Another idea would be making copies of some "Size 4" jean tags to place in those areas... Hmmmm......????

I'd like to give you credit, Mel, for continuing to make this vital info available to us!!! I agree with Beck's thinking on over-weight people becoming self-critical. I use the word "becoming" because I think that over-weight people have had a lot of critics in their lives, who left many negative phrases and thoughts for the person to dwell-on and deal with for years. Praised people...praise themselves...even if there's a little slip-up... they see themselves generally as "worthy" of praise and of just needed to try again or using a different strategy next time. As for Scenerio 1 & 2, I'm more 2... I barter my food through-out the day and swap-out foods routinely. One time that I could have handled my new skills better: Samples were handed-out at our local Farmer's Market. When lasagna... full fat version was offered, I said, "No!"... but it was as if someone had asked if I wanted to hold their pet spider. I startled the woman and myself... others just shrugged! LOL